Guildies
by Codexx
Summary: A collection of short chapters telling the tale of a group of people who play 'World of Warcraft' Rating set at T just in case, Hope you enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

"Umm. Hi. I'm not really used to this whole web-diaries thing. You know, where it's like a diary but with a webcam? Wait… Why am I explaining things to a webcam?" I scrunched my nose in thought and shrugged. "Oh well. Maybe I'll forget what it is one day and I'll be able to watch this and remember, but then I would have to remember to watch it..." I opened the webcam window on my screen and saw that the cam was apparently focused on the wall behind me and too my left. "Oops," I said readjusting the cam so that it was focused on me and not my wall. "I'm Ren. Well, actually I'm Lexi, but I go by Ren. Ren, which is short for Renuhzmay, is my character on World of Warcraft. Yeah, I know. But there are a lot of other girls who play WoW too. I just haven't found many of them yet…" I scrunched up my nose again and started up Warcraft. "Okay, login. Password... Password… Oh, right! Okay, and… Success. I just got a new account set up a few days ago," I explained, still feeling a bit like I was talking to myself. "My brother kept hacking mine and deleting all of my characters. Then he replaced them with gnomes and would send them mail that said stuff like 'Gnome'd' and 'Delete'd' and a few times I got some from him that said 'Jamba Juice'd' and 'Cupcake'd' Once there was a 'Squirrel'd' one. It was really weird… But I made a new character and her name is Renuhzmay. Wait, I think I already told you that. Anyways, she's a level eleven, I think. Yep, eleven and she's a human, a rogue and her professions are… Oh crap. Oh no, oh no… Awww. Murlocs…"


	2. Chapter 2

"Okay, so a few murlocs aren't so bad, but when there's like seven of them…" I shivered, remembering their gurgly-war-cry "Freakish little frog-things…" I muttered. "They're evil. And quick. And slimy. Evil, quick and slimy." I shook my head and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear.. "Oh, I got a new shirt out of game the other day. See?" I said, gesturing to my shirt. "It's funny, because it's a Chest and it says 'Locked Chest. Requires Lockpicking 451'. It's a WoW reference." I laughed a little. "I had to explain it to the delivery guy. He doesn't play Warcraft. He said it was because he had a life and friends. I do too; I just prefer not to use them.... I have friends on Warcraft, though. They're my guildies. Let's see, there's Caboo, a gnome warlock; Hannigan, a night elf hunter; Valtron, a human warrior; Allybear, a dwarf paladin and me, Renuhzmay, a human rouge. We're all level elevens because for the most part, excluding Caboo, we all restarted the same day due to our own aggros. I had brother aggro, Allybear had roomie aggro, Valtron had random-player aggro, and I'm actually not sure what was up with Hannigan… Caboo just didn't want to get left out; he's a _weird_ little gnome-dude. So, before I got gotten by a bunch of murlocs I was telling you about Renuhzmay. She's a level eleven and she's human, a rogue and her professions are skinning and herbalism. She fishes too. I've been considering cooking, but I'm not sure. Maybe first aid, but I can't remember if that was a main or secondary profession. I'll have to check up on that…"


	3. Chapter 3

"So, I checked, but I'm still not sure; I got distracted. Caboo set up voice chat for all us guildies, don't ask me how, and he's been talking _non-stop_ since he logged in." I said, trying not to sound mean, since Caboo was still logged and could hear me.

"Stupid _twerp_ is totally messing with my mojo." Hannigan said angrily, not bothering with niceties.

"What was it you wanted to know, Ren? I'll answer any question for you, my love." Caboo said dreamily. It was weird it sounded like he was behind me. "By the way, what size shirt do you wear again? I found your wish list on J!NX, my sweet little rouge." Somebody, and I had a bad feeling of who it was, pulled out and looked at the tag on my shirt then tucked it back in. "Ah, small. Excellent."

"Caboo?! What are you doing in my house? What are you doing in my room?" I asked, pretty well freaked out.

"Checking to see what size shirt you wear, duh. I was in your kitchen Warcrafting a second ago. Oh, look out, murlocs." Caboo patted me on my shoulder and walked back into my kitchen humming. I was too occupied with the murlocs to freak out on him vocally.

"Woah, _freakadelic_ Ren. I didn't know you let _gnomes_ in your house." Hannigan said, laughing.

"Yeah, neither did I." I said, looting the murlocs and watching my door for Caboo.


	4. Chapter 4

"Okay, so Caboo left after the whole shirt thing and I got my locks changed. That was _really_ freaky, though…" I looked over my shoulder at my door and then shrugged. "Oh, and I figured out that fishing, first aid and cooking are secondary's, so I'll be able to do all three."

"So Ren, Hanni told me Caboo was in your house. Did you let him in?" Allybear asked happily, gathering some peacebloom a few yards in front of me.

"No way, Ally. He was just kinda there. In my house... In my room…."

"Woah…" Ally said and then started laughing.

"Yeah that's what I said, and don't call me Hanni." Hannigan said, taking down a defias that was after Ally.

"Well it was Hanni or Gan. Hannigan is just too much."

"Renuhzmay is a lot more than Hannigan."

"Actually," Valtron said, just having logged in, "Renuhzmay is only _one letter_ longer than Hannigan and we all call Renuhzmay Ren."

"_Fine_ Ally. Call me Hanni." Hannigan said, exasperatedly.

"I'm glad that was worked out nonviolently." Caboo said, logging in.

"Oh lord, the gnome's back." Hanni muttered, making Ally laugh.

"Hey, be nice. Even though he's kinda super freaky he's still a guildie." I said, trying not to sound too defensive.

"Thank you, my love, but I can defend my own honor." Caboo said and then cleared his throat dramatically. "Hanni, what Ren said.'

"How'd _you_ know to call me Hanni? We _just_ agreed on that." Hanni asked, suspiciously and everyone was quiet.


	5. Chapter 5

"Well?" Hanni demanded, sounding pretty ticked.

"Well… We've maybe been calling you Hanni since you made Hannigan," Caboo said nervously. "It was Valtron's idea."

"I was merely thinking of simpler ways of referring to you and Renuhzmay because you two have longer names than the rest of us." Valtron said quickly.

"Fine, whatever, Hanni it is." Hanni said and then muttered a string of what sounded like curse words under her breath.

"I'm _really_ glad _that_ was worked out nonviolently." Caboo said, getting ready to mine an ore. "Oh no. Hanni, there's like three defias coming for me. Hanni. Hanni? Hanni?? Hanni help!! Awwww…"

"What was that all about?" Hanni asked sounding genuinely curious. "I was AFK getting a soda."

"Caboo was totally slaughtered by like three defias. It was hilarious!" Ally said laughing,

"Oh," Hanni said, trying to sound indifferent and then started chuckling.

Valtron laughed for a second and then stopped. "Hey… Hanni, you didn't let the defias get Caboo on purpose, did you?"

"Not intentionally. I was thinking about it and decided to get a soda. I come back and _poof_!"

"It's okay everyone I rezed. Wait, where'd you guys all go?" Caboo asked running in circles.

"To your left, stupid." Hanni said, probably rolling her eyes.

"Okay. Left… Ah now I see you."


	6. Chapter 6

"Hey guys, I'm gonna head down to Goldshire and learn cooking and first aid. You guys want to come?" I asked and started towards Goldshire.

"I will not leave you, my love!" Caboo said, running after me.

"I see no reason in not coming." Valtron said running after Caboo.

"Oh, me too!" Allybear said running after Valtron.

"I am so not staying out here by myself." Hanni said and ran after Ally.

"Wait you guys, it says Goldshire is under attack" Caboo said uneasily.

I rolled my eyes, not that he could see it, so I emoted in game that I rolled my eyes. "Caboo, what's the chance they'll go after one of us?"

"Yeah, gnome-boy. Man up." Hanni said as we got into Goldshire. "Oh crap."

Oh crap was right. There were like 4 level ?? Hordies.

"All right. I'm going to try and get into the inn- Well that's me..." I said and watch the orc totally get me non-provoked.

"I will avenge you my- That's me…" Caboo said as the troll got him.

I bit my lip as a watched Valtron just standing there. "Valtron, the inn. The inn! Get. To. The. Inn!"

"Get where? Oh, that's me…" Valtron said as the tauren backstabbed him out of stealth. "Stupid rouge. No offence Ren."

"That leaves me and Ally. I am so booking it to the inn! And that's me…" Hanni moaned as she joined us at the graveyard after an undead got her.

"Oh look, they're leaving!" Allybear said and waved at them.

"That is _so_ messed up!" Hanni said angrily and ran back to her body. The rest of us rezed and for the most part tried not to laugh while we went into the inn.


	7. Chapter 7

"Okay, so I've got cooking and first aid now." I said happily.

"Yeah Ren, we were there." Hannigan said still POed about the Horde thing.

"I know. I was talking to my webcam."

"That is weird on too many levels."

"It's a web-diary thing." Caboo explained. "I have one too."

"That is weirder on too many more levels…"

"Yeah, I agree," I said while Ally laughed.

"Aww. You two are so cute. I never thought a gnome and a human would get together." Ally said and patted Caboo on the head.

"What? We aren't together!" Caboo and I said in unison.

"Yet." Caboo added and blew kisses at me.

"Ew. Or ever." I said and hid behind Hanni.

"Yuck, gnome germs!" Hanni said moving away from me.

"Oh crap! Again!" Caboo yelled and started running for the inn. "Nooooo!!!!"

"Oh, there's me." Allybear said with a sigh.

"And me." I said, waiting at the graveyard with Caboo and Ally.

"There goes _my_ life-train." Valtron said joining us in the graveyard.

"Ha! I live- Crap!" Hanni said. "There was a fifth one…" She said on our way back to our bodies.

"At least you lived the longest." I said cheerfully.

"I guess that counts for something. Stupid hordies…"


	8. Chapter 8

"So we had a few… dozen… other incidents in Goldshire with the hordies. They were totally ganking us, but hey, it happens. It was almost funny. Caboo kept rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying and rezing and dying…." I said counting off on my fingers until I lost count.

"So did the rest of us, Ren." Hanni said angrily. She was still pretty mad about it.

"Yeah, but it was funny with Caboo." Ally said laughing.

"That it was, that it was." Hanni said with a shrug and went after a bear that was heading for me.

"Thanks Hanni, I've been trying to get that last three peacebloom for ages and I think that draenei pally was going for it, too. Some people just don't kill for their own herbs." I said shaking my head.

"Like you." Hanni pointed out, very incorrectly.

"I kill for my own herbs all the time. And then people take said herbs while I'm killing the monster sitting right on top of it."

"Ren has a good point. I've witnessed such occasions numerous times." Valtron said nodding.

"Valtron, _you_ take my herbs sometimes."

"Well if you would give me a chance to herb my own before you call them, maybe your herbs wouldn't be herbnapped."

"I didn't know you herbed until yesterday!" I said defensively.

"Confuse'd." Caboo said, mining an ore.


	9. Chapter 9

"Okay so I herbalize things and I skin things. Caboo, you mine things and whatever else you do. Valtron, you apparently herbalize things too and so does Allybear, but she only herbalizes silverleaf for whatever reason." I said, going over the situation.

"It's more common." Ally explained cheerfully. "I like easy things."

"That makes sense," I said then continued with my explanation. "Valtron, you told us _yesterday_ you were an herbalist-I think that's the right word-and I don't take all the herbs. You just don't take many of them. And I don't just call and take. Do I?"

"Nope. You say 'Anyone want that insert herb name here?' and then you wait for about 40 seconds-enough time for a response-then if nobody said they wanted it you take it." Caboo said. "Ooo! Copper!"

"Thank you Caboo. Somebody's on my side."

"Hey, I'm on your side, Ren." Hanni said taking down a defias that was heading for Caboo.

"Me too!" Ally said attacking a boar that was walking around by some silverleaf she was going for.

"Wait… Who's on my side?" Valtron asked. "And what was our conflict?"

"You don't remember?" I asked incredulous.

"Wait… Was it about cheese types?"

"No…" Caboo said shaking his head. "No it wasn't about cheese types…"

"Oh… Well I prefer Cheddar in spray form and American in sliced."


	10. Chapter 10

"Wait, so I just confessed my loyalty to Ren and all that happened was Valtron forgot what was going on and started talking about cheese? I hate confessing my loyalty to people." Hanni said and paused for a second. "I do however agree with Valtron's choice of cheese."

"Yep, me too." I said nodding.

"Ditto'd!" Caboo said and high-fived Valtron.

"Yeah, cheese is good." Allybear agreed. "Mmmm. So are crackers _with_ cheese."

"I must agree with you appetite involving cheese and crackers." Valtron said. "I find the combination excellent with sliced and spray as well as spriced, which is putting sliced and spray on the same cracker."

"I'll have to try that sometime," Hannigan decided.

"You should, it's delicious." I said to agreement from Allybear.

"We should start a cheese fan club and we can all join!" Caboo said excitedly.

"We already all partake in the same guild. Creating a fan club for ourselves to celebrate cheese would be foolish and unnecessary." Valtron said wisely.

"Well… Wait what?"

"I think he means we spend enough time together already and it would be ridiculous to add to that over cheese." Hanni said and cooked some boar meat.

"That's a rough interpretation, but essentially that is correct Hannigan." Valtron said nodding.

"Well, maybe a different time…" Caboo said sadly.

"Yeah, maybe Caboo." I said to be nice. "Maybe."


	11. Chapter 11

"Hey guys, I had an excellent idea!" I said logging in and finding the rest of my guildies on as well.

"Okay, shoot." Caboo said giving me his fullest attention.

"No! Hold your fire!" Valtron said ducking his head.

"Valtron, it's an expression. It means tell us your idea."

"I didn't know I had an idea… What was it about?"

"I wasn't your idea, it was Ren's and we still haven't heard it." Hanni said and then added under her breath, "Idiot…"

"Okay, so we're a local guild right? So I was thinking since we all live in the same town we could all get matching shirts and we would recognize each other if we saw each other! How cool?" I said excitedly.

"How would we all get our shirts though? Wouldn't that cost money?" Ally asked.

"That's the best part, they're already made! I got the design and Caboo got everyone's sizes off of your J!NX wish lists, and it would be free for you guys and Caboo could even deliver them."

"We have a stalker-gnome in our guild, lovely." Hanni said her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Well on the bright side I mostly only stalk, or rather follow consistently, persistently and previously without her knowledge, Ren." Caboo said with a happy sigh. "Oh, by the way, you're almost out of laundry detergent."

"Creepy, but sure, shirts sound cool." Hanni said to mutual agreement from the rest of the guildies.


End file.
